Dealing with emotional blackmail when caring for someone

Dealing with emotional blackmail from someone you care for can be emotionally draining and challenging. Here are some strategies to cope with this situation

Dealing with emotional blackmail when caring for someone

Recognise the emotional blackmail

Be aware of the signs of emotional blackmail, such as guilt-tripping, manipulation, threats, or using your affection and care as a means of control. Acknowledging the behaviour is the first step in addressing it effectively.

Set boundaries

Establish clear boundaries and communicate them assertively but compassionately. Let the person know what you are willing and not willing to tolerate. Stick to your boundaries consistently, even if they try to guilt or manipulate you.

Stay calm and composed

Emotional blackmailers often try to provoke emotional reactions to gain control. Practice emotional self-regulation by staying calm, composed, and maintaining a level-headed approach. This helps prevent them from manipulating your emotions.

Validate your emotions

It's essential to acknowledge and validate your own emotions in response to the emotional blackmail. Recognise that it is normal to feel upset, guilty, or conflicted in such situations. Give yourself permission to experience and process these emotions.

Seek support

Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or a therapist who can provide support and guidance. Share your experiences and concerns with them to gain perspective and receive validation for your feelings.

Practice assertive communication

Respond to emotional blackmail with assertive communication. Clearly express your thoughts, feelings, and boundaries without becoming defensive or aggressive. Use "I" statements to communicate your needs and expectations.

Avoid enabling the behaviour

Emotional blackmailers thrive on the power they gain from manipulating others. Refuse to give in to their demands or engage in their manipulative tactics. Avoid rewarding the behaviour by setting firm boundaries and not giving in to their emotional pressure.

Prioritise self-care

Engage in self-care activities that promote your well-being and reduce stress. Focus on activities that bring you joy, relaxation, and help you recharge. Taking care of yourself strengthens your resilience and ability to cope with emotional blackmail.

Consider professional help

If the emotional blackmail persists and becomes unbearable, or if it has a significant impact on your mental health, consider seeking professional help. A therapist or counsellor can provide guidance, strategies, and support tailored to your specific situation.


Remember, you have the right to set boundaries and prioritise your emotional well-being. Coping with emotional blackmail requires resilience, assertiveness, and a support network to help you navigate the situation effectively.

Posted: 03/04/2024






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